It’s a-comin’

It’s getting close to that time of year. Not Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, or any of those other holidays (though you should definitely remember my birthday on December 31). No, I’m talking about National Novel Writing Month! It happens in November, when people who are insane enough sign up to write a complete novel of at least 50,000 words in a single month. I’m participating for the fifteenth time (good Lord!); I did it for the first time in 2001, skipped 2002 because I was traveling a lot for work, and have done it every year since. And every year I’ve hit that 50,000 word goal. And, as I have done every year since 2007, I’ll be one of two Municipal Liaisons in the Sacramento area. This means that it’s up to me and my friend Katster to coordinate participants, arrange meetups and parties, and what-not.

nanowrimo_2016_webbadge_municipalliaison

Usually this is the part where I beg for money to send me to the Night of Writing Dangerously, but I’ve decided not to go this year. It’s fun, but I’ve done it for five years now, and now someone else can have the fun.

Anyway. This year I plan on writing a total of 60,000 words instead of just 50,000. That means a minimum of 2,000 words per day of November. It’ll be tricky, what with visiting family over Thanksgiving and all, but I’m sure I’ll make it work.

The novel I’ll be writing is called And the Devil Will Drag You Under. I got the title from the song “Sit Down You’re Rocking the Boat” from the musical Guys & Dolls. My novel has nothing to do with the musical, or the song, really. I just liked the title. It also has nothing to do with the Jack L. Chalker novel of the same name. And you can’t copyright a novel title, so I’m golden.

Usually I put my novel online as I’m writing it, but I won’t be doing that this time around. I’m too excited about the novel and will hopefully one day clean it up and send it out into the world to be published, and putting it online counts as a form of publication, which might get in the way of my chances to sell first publication rights to anyone. So I won’t be doing that this year.

Here, enjoy the song from Guys & Dolls. It’s a fun song, even if, thematically, it has nothing (or at least, very little) to do with my novel.

Well, then. Wheeze. Pant. Etc.

Next Thursday, I’m going in for the first of three sessions of a procedure known as “bronchial thermoplasty“, meant to improve my asthma, which has been flaring up irresponsibly since I had a respiratory infection about three months ago. When I went to my pulmonologist last week to discuss the procedure, he waggled his finger at me about my weight, explaining that not only is there significant inflammation in my lungs, my weight also prevents my lungs from expanding fully when I inhale.

Turns out he was right to chastise me.

This morning I weighed in at just a hair over 300 pounds.

This… this is unacceptable.

I’ve resolved before to lose weight; I mean, I’ve been overweight since junior high school, when my physician first chided me for it. I’ve never really stuck to it, though. I like food too much. I lead a sedentary lifestyle (mostly in front of the computer or behind a book). And everything else that’s bad for you.

And yet, there are so many things I want to do that require at least a modicum of physical fitness. For example, I would like to:

  • Visit Antarctica;
  • Visit the Galapagos Islands;
  • Go snorkeling;
  • Go SCUBA diving;
  • Go caving (not spelunking, mind you, I have no desire to do that);

…and so on. But right now I’m in a state where I can’t even walk around the block without getting wheezy and short of breath. Not ideal for anything, really, let alone wandering ice floes and saying Hi to penguins.

So here goes. I’m going to launch a personal initiative called “Zero to Hero” (yes I know it’s a song from Disney’s Hercules movie, just bear with me). It’s not much. Just a program of exercise and food intake that will hopefully get me into much better physical condition, hopefully by the time I’m fifty. ‘Cause frankly, I’m tired of where I’m at in this regard.

Ideally, the bronchial thermoplasty treatments will reduce my asthma symptoms to the point where I can walk around the block without wheezing. But they’re not the only thing I need. I need to take a serious look at how I’m conducting my life, and make some changes. The primary issue is I don’t like exercise, and also I like fatty, greasy, carb-rich foods. Preferably fried. So I need to figure out some way to make these changes in a way which makes me happy, which makes, say, running a 5K more enjoyable than sitting and staring at my computer during the same amount of time.

I’m open to suggestions.

In the meantime, though, please enjoy this video of an otter learning how to use an inhaler.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxfPYLPLDBM