Prologue: Yesterday, in my Live Journal, giddy with excitement over having finished a major project, I wrote, “Perl is my bitch.” I should have known better.
Me: Okay, Perl, let’s get busy. Yesterday we figured out how to move files from one server to another one file at a time. Today let’s work out how to move more than one at a time.
Me: So, let’s do it. Here, move these files.
Me: Okay, let’s try another approach.
Perl: Uh uh.
Me: C’mon, I’ll give you a nice little upgrade if you work with me on this.
Perl: I refuse.
Perl: You heard me. Fuck this, I’m going to take a nap.
Me: No, you can’t! We’re on a deadline! This was supposed to be done yesterday!
Perl: Yawn. Like I care.
Me: You bastard! Okay, here, have a major code rewrite!
Perl: Oh, neat. Watch me crash.
Perl: In fact, I think I’ll take all these files with me!
Me: You’re kidding!
Perl: Yeah, I’m just kidding.
Me: Oh, thank God.
Perl: Bwah ha ha haaa!! I wasn’t kidding!! Watch those files evaporate into electronic mist!
Me: Hah! I have those files backed up on our old development server! Nice try!
Perl: Oh, poop.
Me: Okay, I’ll pull out a majority of your code base and replace it with something I know works. Try that on for size!
Me: Um. Oops.
Me: Oh, come on! Let go of those files!
Perl: Don’t want to. They’re mine, all mine. I’ve done a total permissions change on them and now you can’t touch them!
Me: Oh my god.
Perl: Who’s the bitch now?